What drives you?
For as long as I can remember, I’ve always wanted to help.
Maybe it’s because I like to feel like I’m making a difference. Maybe it’s because I don’t like to see people struggling. Maybe it’s because I like to feel needed. All I know is that with my friends, in my businesses, and in life it’s always the same – I just want to know I’m doing my part to make the world a better place and not wasting what little time I have on this earth.
In a word; contribution.
Each and every day I try and put myself in other people’s shoes and see how I can of service to them.
I imagine what “me” other people want.
Some people love my humor, so I set out to make them smile and laugh. Other people want insights into success, so I do my best to do that. Other people ask me how I have such a good relationship with my family, so I share that with them.
I used to be somewhat one dimensional with English as my only skill, but have worked hard to develop myself and now am well versed in a few different areas. All of which have the potential to help others.
I know I can’t be everything for everyone, but I can be important to some people. And my goal is to simply make that group of people bigger each day.
That’s why I run my business, wrote my book, create posts, podcasts, and youtube videos. I’ve added a financial seminar to my repertoire and hope to add a success seminar next year. People might think it’s all about money, but it’s not.
I do admit that I don’t give all my stuff away for free. I share part of what I know, but I do keep some tricks up my sleeves.
I mean, what good would it do a magician to reveal all his secrets?
While I want to help a great many people, I don’t want to help people who aren’t serious.
I don’t want to waste their time but, more importantly, I don’t want to waste mine.
86,400 seconds is all I get each day and I don’t want to waste them on people who have no interest in applying the ideas that I have to offer.
To me, it’s about seeing the change in people that really excites me.
Now that doesn’t mean I want people to do everything I say, but I do want people to come away with something valuable. Even if all that is is to go in search of more ideas.
Seeing good advice fall on deaf ears just isn’t my thing.
I want to spend my time with those who do want to listen and are committed to making a change in their lives. And crazy as it sounds, money somewhat guarantees that.
When I spend my hard earned money on anything educational, you can bet I have a stronger desire to actually study than had I gotten it for free. The more I spend, the more focused I become and sadly that is the case for most people.
Most people have too much on their plate to make a serious commitment of study but add in a largish amount of money and somehow, by some miracle, they are able to find some time. Moreover, they seem to be 10x more focused on the subject matter.
So while I don’t do it for the money, I do believe that money is a necessary requirement and it should be for you.
Never be ashamed of asking for money for your skill that you have devoted countless hours developing.
And the more money I make, the more power I have to get my message out there and the more time I can devote to helping people.
In the end, everyone wins, I get what I want in the form of monetary reward as well as knowing I’m helping doing my part to make the world a better place and my clients get the knowledge that they signed up for.
Tony Robbins talks about 6 basic needs that shape our lives in one form or another. They are:
- Certainty/Comfort. We all want comfort. And much of this comfort comes from certainty. Of course there is no ABSOLUTE certainty, but we want certainty the car will start, the water will flow from the tap when we turn it on and the currency we use will hold its value.
- Variety. At the same time we want certainty, we also crave variety. Paradoxically, there needs to be enough UNcertainty to provide spice and adventure in our lives.
- Significance. Deep down, we all want to be important. We want our life to have meaning and significance. I can imagine no worse a death than to think my life didn’t matter.
- Connection/Love. It would be hard to argue against the need for love. We want to feel part of a community. We want to be cared for and cared about.
- Growth. There could be some people who say they don’t want to grow, but I think they’re simply fearful of doing so—or perhaps NOT doing so. To become better, to improve our skills, to stretch and excel may be more evident in some than others, but it’s there.
- Contribution. To help shape the world.
So contribution (and to a lesser extent significance) drives me, but what about you?
Understanding just who we are and what we want helps us focus our energies and allows us to live a more fulfilling life.
Take just 10 minutes to consider carefully which of these needs drives you, it could very well be the best 10 minutes you spend all month.
Adrian Shepherd